E-mail Course - The Art of Lovemaking
 

The Art of Lovemaking


Lesson 4 - Sensual Play - Pleasure Without Penetration

By Nisandeh and Vered Neta

No-Problem-Marriage-Counseling.Com


Hello Friends,

Today's lesson is about making love leisurely and the importance of FOREPLAY.

For those of you who have not heard of this before - yes it does exist! It's not all about ripping off your clothes, getting it on and BOOM before you know it, ITS OVER!

For decades the emphasis has been on achieving an orgasm.
Straining to reach the big "O" has taken away the pleasure we are supposed to feel during lovemaking. We concentrate so much on climaxing, that our sensory responses are diminished. Remember, the mind feeds upon the stimulation of all five senses.

This is especially important when you no longer experience the adventure of doing something different together. When intimacy has become a "day-in, day-out" routine. Just like doing the dishes or taking out the garbage!

Think about the first time you kissed or made love. It was sensational, right? Therefore, it's vital that you take the time to get to know each other again.

You are going to learn how to practice sensual play, without actually having sex.

That means focusing on really getting to know each other in the deepest sense.

Sensual play is basically slow-motion foreplay and can last for hours.

Mmmmmm…

Imagine hours of pleasure. Sounds good… well read on.

There is a consensus of female opinion that men seem to be in a hurry when making love. SLOW DOWN MEN! Why rush pleasure!

Men need to realize that women want to be loved, all over (i.e. from head to toe)!

Start warming each other up on a slow burner and you'll both reach full heat without strain or struggle.

The longer you simmer, the hotter it gets!

When you slow down you are able to fully savor the pleasure of your senses.

You need to TASTE each other, TOUCH each other, SEE each other, HEAR each other and SMELL each other.

This will not only bring you closer, it will also make you want each other more - resulting in an explosive climax.

When lovemaking is primarily sensual play, it should be leisurely and should last from 30 minutes to several hours.

Here are three magical statements, you should say to each other, that will help the both of you to relax and increase your sensations of pleasure:

  • We Have Got Plenty of Time
  • I Enjoy Giving You Pleasure
  • Tell Me What You Want Me to Do

This attitude releases both of you from the pressure of penetrating and performing and creates a much more relaxing atmosphere.

Sensual play is a process that really allows you to explore and get to know one another. The better you know each another, the more there is to love about each other. It is a great way to enjoy sexual intimacy, which is sensual, leisurely and relaxed.


Today's Practice

You are definitely going to be counting the hours to tonight's practice.

Okay, lets get down to some serious teaching (playing)!

Sensual foreplay means a lot of all over kissing, stroking and caressing, so ensure you are fresh, clean and lovable.

A romantic soak in the tub together is a great way to heat things up!

Touch each other at leisure. Do not rush. Don't worry about achieving an orgasm - this is not the goal tonight.

Tell each other exactly where and how you want to be touched. Each one of you has different sexual responses; so explore with each other about what turns you on.

Include all forms of touch, such as stroking, caressing and holding, as well as kissing, nibbling, sucking and licking. It can involve every part of the body and not just the most obvious sexual areas, such as genitals or breasts.

In the next lesson you'll learn about the major and minor erogenous zones, so you can appreciate how the whole body can be responsive to erotic touch.

For the woman:
Any part of your body can become a sensual tool. The sweep of your hair, the soft brush of your nipples against his body, or the warmth of your breath on his skin will be extremely arousing to him. Trailing your fingertips or nails lightly over his skin will heighten its sensitivity.

Involve your whole body in sensual play, so that even while kissing one part of his body, you are aware of the impact of your thighs, belly and pubic area as they press gently against him.

For the man:
A woman's whole body, not just her most obvious sexual areas, is an erogenous zone. Take time to let your kisses and touches worship her body. Focus your attention not just on the front of her body, but on her arms, legs and back. Cover her back with kisses, following its sensuous curves and lines. Then stroke and gently squeeze the muscles in her buttocks and thighs so that they become warm and erotically alive.

A woman's body has many surprising and hidden areas of sexual sensitivity. Sensual play allows you to unravel its mysteries, so that you both can discover new and exciting pleasure places. The underarm and armpit can be very responsive to your loving attention. Try rolling your tongue lazily over its soft skin while gently stroking her breast.

Your extended foreplay should give you time to relax together emotionally, as well as becoming sexually aroused. Use these moments of tenderness and touching to enhance your intimate connection. 

Do not be afraid to let your states of arousal rise and fall like waves. Once you are in harmony, both physically and emotionally, you can ride those waves together, letting one peak of excitement ebb to give way to another.

Touching, stroking, caressing and eye contact will keep you closely attuned to each other.

Come on, don't waste anymore time. Ecstasy awaits you!

Have Fun!


Do you need additional guidance, support or information?

This week's suggested reading:
Five Steps to Increased Intimacy in Your Life by Nisandeh


Next lesson

The keys to better foreplay are the major and minor erogenous zones.

In the next lesson you are going to learn how to stimulate these sensitive areas of skin in the right way, so you trigger sensual feelings and sexual arousal and create sensational lovemaking.

Live Passionately,

Nisandeh and Vered


About the instructors

Nisandeh and Vered NetaVered has focused on relationship and communication issues as the facilitator of workshops and individual counseling sessions with more than 22,000 people since 1990.

Nisandeh has focused on relationships, intimacy, and sexuality issues as the facilitator of smaller workshops and individual counseling sessions with more than 4,000 people since 1996.

They are the creators and leaders of the Life Partnership training and Art of Intimacy and Art of Relating workshops.

They both write extensively for online and print magazines around the world.


Copyright © 2003 Nisandeh & Vered Neta. All rights reserved.
With the exception of one print copy for your own personal use, the copyrighted material from The Art of Lovemaking course may not be reproduced, forwarded, or redistributed by any means, print or electronic. This material may not be incorporated into other programs/training.


Disclaimer: All material provided by Nisandeh and Vered Neta is provided for educational purposes only. Keep in mind that this material is not intended to be a substitute for professional counseling.


Contact Information

www.no-problem-marriage-counseling.com

Nisandeh and Vered Neta
Wethouder Driessenstraat 157
1107 XJ Amsterdam
The Netherlands

Phone: +31 (0) 20-691 61 22
Fax:    +31 (0) 20-609 76 73
E-mail: info@no-problem-marriage-counseling.com